It's been a big week around here

Last Saturday we watched with pride and through tears as Cooper (10) boarded a bus to head to 2 weeks of overnight camp in Northern Michigan.

All week I have been anxiously waiting for the camp's updates and pictures on our camp app, in the hopes that I'll see Cooper and he'll be smiling.

At one point, we caved and emailed them to make sure he was doing OK and the report is that he is doing great. After five years of screen time and safe nervous systems to coregulate him, he is screen free, without his service dog, living in a cabin in the woods with 8 other boys he's never met before.

Even the fact that he got on the bus excitedly was a win, and regardless of how things turn out or if he ends up coming home early (we are on alert to jump in the car and drive the 4 hours to get him), it is a HUGE step in his journey as a PDA child.

Back at home, I have been practicing what I preach. 

I have been providing William - 6, and seeming close to burnout - full autonomy around attending the summer day camps we have already paid for.

After staying home all of last week he surprised us and went to two days of soccer camp this week.

Most days, though, the house has been full of vocal stims and William climbing on our bodies as we try to work, with frequent requests for treats and food deliveries.

We're trying to be compassionate, and to meet his bids for play and attention when we can and not give in to the urge to make boredom his "punishment" for staying home.

As you know, that's not easy. We get dysregulated, too. 

But we've been leaning into finding humor and self-compassion.

Compassion for myself - for example - when I forgot my 12th wedding anniversary, forgot to pay the gas and water bill, and had to lean on my mother-in-law to get my husband his 45th birthday gift because I couldn't manage to leave the house. (She picked out 10 different bottles of beer, all stouts, his favorite.)

Anyways, I wanted to let you all know that we are here in the trenches with you finding our moments of stillness and presence in the uncertainty of it all.

Yours in regulation,
Casey